The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
