Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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