Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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