Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize