thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
