I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
