Do you still have your period?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize