Sry I called you an 8
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
