mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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