Dual....:-)
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
