I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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