hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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