I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
