he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
