billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Found the puke drawer
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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