So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
