im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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