Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
