talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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