with your own penis?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize