found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
