I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Randomize
