but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
sex in a hospital.. check
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
