Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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