I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
How does one acquire holy water?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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