She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
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