How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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