Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
