Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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