I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
