You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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