On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize
