shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
how do flat chested girls get laid?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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