And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
