Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I didn't shave. On purpose
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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