Buhtt sex?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
