The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
