I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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