This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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