i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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