and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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