this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
