How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
