I want to stick my p in your. b.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
