We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
