she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Randomize
