no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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