its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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