Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize