make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Randomize
