My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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